The Ex, The In-Laws and Death...Damn

Today I received a phone call from my ex husband today that I really wouldn't wish on anyone. Despite the fact that I may have some ill feelings about what happened between he and I and some of the things that went down, I do not, I repeat, do not wish the death of a parent on anyone.

My dilema in all of this is telling the children we share together. My personal belief is it is not my responsibility to be the one to tell them -- as the deceased grandparent is not my mother. The good news is that when I expressed my concern about it, we came to a decision to tell them together. I am quite sure I will probably have to be the more vocal parent because my guess is the ex husband will be too emotional to say too much.  The way I figure it, I'm not such a cold, hard, bitch that I can't be there for him at this present time -- I just hope he doesn't take my kindness and run with it -- As this is a one time deal.


So tomorrow is the day he'll make the trip here, face the reality of it all, and then of course his having the expectation that I will be there -- and I thought this is what his having a girl friend was all about. Isn't this her job? Tomorrow is a new day and I am going to face it with my grownwoman gear on and handle it. I am unsure of how my children are going to handle the death of their grandfather because that remains to be seen. Tomorrow will tell the tale. I just hope that they understand that death is a part of life and they will see him again. I'd like to think of it as my children having one more guardian angel on their side to help them get through this thing we call life.

How am I handling it? Well I don't do death. Yes, I know it is a part of life but I try not to think about it. Have I called my Ex MIL and give her my condolences -- not as of yet. But I will, I need time. She's not my favorite person but, again, I know I have to put my big girl draws on and do this.

Until Tomorrow...